Parenting a Special Kid

3 Feb

Parenting a special needs child is hard. It hurts. It pains in a way which you wouldn’t understand unless you are parenting a special needs child yourself.

Sometimes the most simplest things that everyday kids excel in are a struggle for a special needs child. For example: learning to read, trying to tie shoe laces, playing sports, getting dressed, making (and keeping) friends.

Other children can actually be a special needs child’s nightmare. Children don’t think about what words they use to other children who are different to them. They don’t understand how their words and actions can make a special needs child feel so worthless, so devalued, so useless in society and so unloved. At times they feel suicidal.

Watching your child struggle time and time again tears your heart out. Sometimes I want to shake other kids and say just be nice, learn to appreciate the wonderful, great things about this kid that you are totally rejecting.

Special needs kids are quirky. They each have wonderful unique gifts and personalities, if only you’d take the time to get to know them and move beyond their differences. My son has a memory that soaks things up like a sponge. He can tell you all sorts of facts. Granted he doesn’t get the social cues about when to stop, but, seriously, if you want to know anything about space, history, ice hockey then he’s your boy.

I love my boy so much. He has had to climb mountains which have been mere hills to “regular” kids. Life will be one big fight for him. It devastates me that through his short life he has experienced so much pain, he is hurting inside so much and there’s not a lot I can do about it. All I can do is love him, tell him how proud I am of him, encourage him and hope, pray, that life won’t always be this tough for him.

If there is one thing parents can do, then it is to teach their children that different is good. To treat others how they would like others to treat them. To learn to accept people as they are, to make them feel welcome and to include not exclude. Maybe then life would get a little easier for children who struggle.

I’m raw tonight. It’s been another challenging day for my boy. My maternal instinct is to shelter him from the world forever, this is not realistic though! He is entering his teens next year and i know this means things will get rougher. I still dream of a bright and wonderful future for him. May it be so Lord, may it be so.


3 Responses to “Parenting a Special Kid”

  1. cindy February 3, 2011 at 22:07 #

    Great post Lyn!! I don’t have any idea how hard it is, but I think you are exemplary in your perspective. Your love is unending for your kids and at the end of the day that’s what he’s going to remember. Bless you!!

  2. lynhallewell February 4, 2011 at 08:31 #

    Thanks Cindy x
    Love you!


  1. Tweets that mention Parenting a Special Kid « Beyond the 4 Walls -- - February 5, 2011

    […] This post was mentioned on Twitter by jonhallewell, homeschool mama. homeschool mama said: Parenting a Special Kid: My son has #Aspergers, life can be tough. […]

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